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I began to think that when targeting a man with dough, a girl is best off fishing in a more transparent pool – ie one that does what it says on the tin rather than masquerading as a traditional dating site.

cuts to the chase – and while I was now dubious at how many more ‘millionaires’ would be on there than were on at least I wouldn’t have to invest so much time talking about trouts in Yorkshire or anal sex.

Now, thanks to online dating, so-called ‘mutually beneficial’ relationships have never been easier to come by.

‘The people on them are all there for the same thing as opposed to dating sites where you don’t know what people’s intentions are.

I wasn’t quite sure if this was a post-modern comment on the randomness of online dating or if he was a victim of early onset dementia. Meanwhile their profiles demanded ‘you will be slim, attractive and available for lunchtime meet-ups’.

Messages from anonymous (aka married) members saying ‘I like going out and staying in, weekends away and holidays in the sun’ were as creative as they came.

‘I am sociable, well-educated and enjoy a rich and varied social life, but would like to meet someone special who I have a connection with to share intimate moments and memorable times.

‘I’d like to meet a man who is open, kind, sensual and laid back, someone with a good sense of humour and a glass half full attitude.’ It didn’t take long for the messages to flood in but my enthusiasm was dented by the standard of ‘millionaire’.

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