Because, if you are like most people, you might be missing the red flags that you are in a relationship with an abuser.
Chances are that you don’t want to see these red flags because you so desperately want to believe that your abuser actually loves you, or cares about you – or wants the best for you.
And because it’s often so difficult to break away from an abusive relationship for all these reasons above, it’s essential that you take a cold, clear look at your situation.
Only then can you make a clear, informed decision, and live the life of self-worth and love that you deserve to live.
One of the most confusing things about abusive partners is that while they shut you down in person and “don’t want to hear it”, they keep a close eye on you when you are apart.
This is not jealousy driven by care, but jealousy driven by control.So take a moment and ask yourself if you recognize any of these behaviors in your partner or yourself. They insult and put you down both in private and in front of others as a method of eroding your self-esteem, which they hope will make you more dependent on them.Then, if you or someone else protests, they will laugh it off and either claim that they are “just joking” and that you have no sense of humor or are just “too sensitive” (1).These are classic behaviors of abusers because they exhibit different expressions of one of their core traits: taking no responsibility for their own choices while wholly putting the blame of their own pain or misfortune on the abused.An emotional abuser will exclude you not only from their heart, from their good will and from their approval, they will also exclude you from their activities.