Intercultural dating problems

In 2012, 15.1 percent of new marriages were interracial.To many, interracial relationships are now almost a non-issue; just love whomever you want to love.Maybe the skeptics around you haven’t seen a beautiful, healthy, thriving interracial relationship.Treat each other well — and each other’s families well — and set an example of grace as family and friends slowly warm up to you and your partner.As part of Committed, we're exploring partnerships ranging from a textbook marriage between high-school sweethearts to a gay couple creating a life together in the conservative deep South.I love my husband unconditionally, and we have amazing chemistry, but we’re also definite proof that opposites attract. None of these differences were deal breakers as we fell deeper and deeper in love, but even before America appeared to be on the verge of collapse, being in an interracial relationship came with its fair share of challenges.I figured that as long as I was able to abide by respectability politics and not be lumped together with those "other lazy Negroes," I could just be the token black girl.

I called interactions with these types of guys "science projects," because they approached me like I was some sort of foreign specimen in a lab they just couldn't wait to examine. Growing up in the predominantly white suburbs of Fairfield County, Connecticut, the dating pool was pretty shallow for a black girl.

As a survival tactic, I learned how to disassociate every time I heard someone at a party "accidentally" drop an N-bomb.

I was also under the illusion that because people thought I "sounded white," it was possible for me to transcend racial stereotypes.

But then Xavier came along, and things felt different.

I’d always thought "the butterflies" were bullsh*t, but anytime I saw him, that’s the only way I can describe how he made me feel.