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We , those who love Rachel, were constantly analyzing the demeanor of every juror throughout the proceedings.By the closing statements I was mentally depleted beyond words--scared shitless and mad may be better descriptives.My first "visitation" occurred in the middle of the Defense's statements--in a state of deep depression I saw out of the corner of my eye a little girl seated to my right that I knew Rachel loved profoundly--I turned and looked at her and thought I heard Rachel say."Hi Dad, you know that my life was all about love--don't be angry- everything will be alright, love will have the final word." Well, that changed me on the spot and peace carried me for the rest of that day.I needed some grace again after the jury was finally retired.